Every year, I pull out all the stops and observe Lent with a fierceness that shocks those around me. I do this partially for the religious education, but primarily as an exercise in self control and temptation.
And let me tell you, this year has been one of temptation. This year I decided to give up all sweets. Yes, I have not tasted anything sweet since February 13th (39 days ago, but who's counting?). And it may sound like a trivial thing, but when you already exist on a gluten and dairy free diet, dessert is pretty much the only joy left in the world. And as much as I love meat and vegetables, I am about ready to stab my eyes out.
I've had some mixed experiences with my Lenten sacrifices. There was the year that I gave up desserts, but convinced myself that Fig Newtons were a fruit-based health food, so I ate half a box of Fig Newtons a day. Or last year, when I only gave up chocolate and became dependent on Swedish Fish (am I right, Lindsey?). Or my senior year of college when I gave up alcohol, and well...I cried myself to sleep. I am proud to say that I've done a pretty good job this year!
It's been a struggle. I'm pretty sure God has been testing me. Like when he put the school group of 80 middle schoolers on both of my flights to DC (with departure gates next to a Ben and Jerry's). Or when he sent me to three consecutive birthday parties with dark chocolate birthday cakes. Thanks, God!
As I was listening to the cathedral choir chant the passion of Christ exquisitely today, I was reminded why I do this to myself every year. There is no deeper joy than receiving once again that which you have sorely missed. To see again a person/lost dog/childhood toy/favorite sweater/car key/cell phone/$20 bill that you thought you would never lay eyes on again. To find hope when you had no hope.
At 12:01am on Sunday I will take a bite of Cold Stone cake batter ice cream with sprinkles and hot fudge. If you aren't doing anything at the time, you should come join me.
If you've never seen a full grown woman cry over ice cream, it's really something.
May Easter Day bring you deep and delirious happiness as well.
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